Sunday, March 28, 2010

Cricket

I am a cricket, a small green cricket,
caught by an eager young child not yet mature,
in the heat of the summer sunset,
I've been placed in a small brown shoebox.
I cannot find the holes to breathe,
the river's tent stands tall and proud.

Toil and travail are worth my time
for I find my way from captivity
and breathe the sweet air of freedom
as amber breezes caress my face.
I am a cricket, a small green cricket.

Saturday, March 27, 2010

WHY???

Why did our paths cross once again? I did not wish it so,
I would have been more than content had we remained apart,
distant, disconnected, without communication, uninvolved.
I am happy now and do not want to review the past.
I do not want to relive it or cherish the memory in my mind,
honestly, I do not wish to return there.
But you reappear over and over again, back into my life
you pry and wriggle yourself in, pushing me and pushing me
to talk to you again. I settle and talk openly.
You leave, your intentions unclear, and I'm left regretting
having said hello to the person beside you. I did not want
to talk to you, I did not want to open myself and look back at the past,
I did not want to relive the coy things I may have said,
I did not want to sit there and have you harass me, yes, harass me
verbally about what I'm doing now, it's my love-life, my social-life,
my school-life. You know, it's my life, shut up and leave me alone.
I don't judge yours. I did not want to have all those conversations.
I purposely ignore you, yes it's true, I've been ignoring you
for almost a year and to tell the truth it's worked pretty well so far.
Until now, why? Why do you insist on remaining a part of my life?
Do you not get it? I ignore you, you talk to me and I don't answer.
You attempt contact and I reject you, you attempt again and
months pass. Months, don't you get it?
I don't want you in my life and I can't make it clear.
Why can't I make it clear, you know why? Because you start
asking questions and I answer, foolishly, and the conversation
is always about the past. Then the obligatory questions of the now
followed inevitably by questions and stories of the future.
You pry, pry, pry into my life; I do not want you to, I don't ask
about you but you tell anyways. Leave me be? No? Why?
Because you seem to still think I'm interested.
You are interested, you are, I know it. Why don't you let it go?
You were with her for a year, didn't touch her once, and brag about it.
Yet you wish you had, you said so, you wanted it.
We both denied you. Doesn't feel good, does it?
But you don't care cause I know you've been quite busy,
going around, whether anonymously or openly, I don't care.
I didn't want to hear it, you just wouldn't shut up. You still won't.
Now, not only do you seek me out but you hold
something against him. He did nothing to you, he never hurt you
or spoke to you. Leave him the hell alone, seriously, leave him be.
What on earth do you have against him?
He only received what you were denied, what you left behind,
what you forsook when you ripped my heart,
you didn't think about that, did you?
You didn't think about that in the heat of August, your loss.
Your loss, I'm glad you didn't gain it.
I'd regret everything in that case.
You were never right and you never will be.
Stay out of my life.

Wednesday, March 10, 2010

Musings, daydreams, things

I'm not sure why
I knew that then.
Call it

intuition.

Whatever it was,
my mind

swayed

from fear and
uncertainty;

my heart

veered from hurt
and bitterness

toward

the likely idea
that, away from
home, my

future

might
blossom with

hope.